We're all familiar with the adage "it takes a village to raise a child," and I agree that community is crucial to children. But, I think that this notion of "village" is just as important for parents. I'm reminded weekly that, although we live far from our families, we've become a part of some great local communities. Motherhood (and pregnancy, and even just life in general) holds challenges and plenty of opportunities for growth and learning. Why not tap into a pool of collective wisdom? La Leche League, parenting groups, neighborhood networks, library story time . . . these all provide so many great opportunities to jump in and expand your own community.
There is something about the intensity of parenting young tots that seems to take away some of the barriers that usually stand in the way of our getting to know our peers. Maybe it's just the sleep deprivation talking, but I've found that some of the most honest talks I've had have been with other parents. At this early stage of parenthood, we're not yet in super competitive mode (a la, "my child just got into X Academy/ won the Pulitzer Prize/ etc). Well, maybe we are a little competitive here and there, but we're mainly quite down-to-earth. I hope that the time and effort I put into community-building now affords me similar opportunities to connect with other parents and build relationships even as our children get older.
I know that our schedules will become even more hectic-- with many at-home parents returning to work or logging more hours and kids' school and extra-curricular schedules varying. Still, I hope that we remember how important it is to be a real part of a community, how much better off we are as individuals when we have support during rough times and when we are able to use our talents and knowledge for the betterment of our friends. "I am part of all that I have met," said Tennyson. I sincerely hope that this continues to ring true for me.
I do not, as a rule, make friends very fast or often. Since Moira has come along the ease with which I find myself reaching out to people is amazing. I'm so glad this is a lesson she's been able to teach me.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad to have been brought together with a huge group of awesome women via my pregnancy and Rhayna's entry to this world. I think its something that on a very basic "survival" level women can just exist in the presence of eachother during these early formative months & years and not feel like there's society's pressure to be catty, back-stabbing, competitive, or ever feel the need to cut eachother down....I just told a friend the other day (who coincidentally lives thousands of miles away, is a mom, and was feeling very unsure of herself)..."We're all just winging this - it may APPEAR that someone else really has it all together and really _knows_ what they're doing but I promise you, they too have their days of unpredictability, unsure-ness, and confusion! Band together with other moms and you'll see you're not alone!" I don't think truer words have ever crossed my lips! Thank you for being a part of my network - I count you in my blessings daily! :)
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