Evelyn's Art

Mommy

Sad Henry (he can't reach his balloon)

Mimi

Fish Tank with a Mommy, Daddy, and girl fish along the sides.  Sea weed and fish food on the bottome

"I do! I do!"

 A few things Henry has been saying or enjoying lately:

1. count "one, two, thwee"
2. He loves to answer "I do, I do!" whenever I ask if anyone wants to eat breakfast/ go for a walk/ read a book/ etc.  There is usually a happy dance that accompanies this!
3. "I know! I know!"  When Henry had an idea for a book tonight, he prefaced it with "I know!" instead of just thrusting the book into my face.  It was adorable.
4. Nap time cooperation!  In the bed!  For many months, Henry would only reliably fall asleep at nap time in the car seat or the stroller (and occasionally in the Ergo or my lap)  Now, he actually says "bed!" when he gets sleepy at nap time and we nurse in the big bed until he falls asleep and then I actually have a good 1- 1 1/2 hours of relatively quiet time.  Evie and I usually snuggle, read books, do arts and crafts, or watch a movie.  

Henry also loves to help bring Evelyn to preschool and pick her up.  He gets very excited when she shows off her projects.  Recently, she brought home a bag of veggies and sang a vegetable soup song and Henry exclaimed "oh, wow!"  For her part, Evelyn shows great enthusiasm when Henry shows off his hand stamp from gymnastics class.  It's very sweet.



 

Learning What They Live

Henry helps Morabelle settle down in the sling.

Kids have a way of holding a mirror up to their parents.  From the time that Evelyn could speak, I have had daily glimpses of my phrases, mannerisms, and habits.  Most of the time, it's not too unflattering.  It is clear from both Evelyn's and Henry's play that when I talk on the phone, I walk around the house and often say "doing well, how are you?  Yeah, yeah, bye!"  Of course, there are also moments when I hear my words on the lips of my child and I just cringe.  Do I really sound like that?  I'm sure I do get exasperated sometimes; I'm only human.

Today, Evelyn and Henry were pretending that Evelyn's little white dog (Morabelle) was very tired and sad.  Evelyn tried to wrap her up in a blanket for a nap.  Henry suggested we put her in the Ergo.  I found a doll sling and the kids took turns wearing little Morabelle, patting her gently as they bounced.  It was very sweet to see that they'd picked up such gentle and loving techniques.

Names

Henry said his name today, "Henny."  He's been calling himself "baby" or "boy" when he sees himself in the mirror or in a photo, but today was the first time he's tried to say Henry.  At dinner, he called himself "Buddy;" I had to laugh.  I probably don't realize how often I call him "Buddy."  I can't help it.  I love little pet names.  (In my family, we have many nicknames-- many of them are nonsensical and all of them are unrelated to our actual names.)

A Snowy Day

Evelyn's Game

While Henry napped this afternoon, Evelyn and I spent time together.  We built an elaborate city of wooden block buildings, complete with a train and station.  Without a toddler in sight to knock the city down to size, Evelyn was able to plan out a design and actually see it through.  She really enjoyed that.  Later, she traced some letters.  It's so fun to me that she knows every letter by sight.  We're connecting the letters to sounds now, but not in any formal way.  I like to take what Evelyn is interested in and then go from there.  Right now, she is very interested in writing stories and silly poems (a la "Where The Sidewalk Ends" by Shel Silverstein).

"Mom, soon Henry will grow up to be my friend.  We won't have a baby anymore-- just two kids!"

Tracing letters and reviewing the alphabet's order.

Evelyn has also had a lot of fun with board games lately.  My best friend was in town recently (which was such a lovely treat!) and one of the gifts she gave Evelyn was a memory game-- a huge hit.  Today, Evelyn decided to create her own game.  She used markers to draw the game board and then she crumpled up two pieces of paper to use as pawns.  I think she's sure this is the proper way to make game pieces, as this is her interpretation of some instructions we read in a book on how to fold paper for a fairy game piece.  She also asked me to draw a spinner and she glued hands on it and cut it out.  It doesn't spin, so we just pretend.  In this game, the winner (so far, always Evelyn) is the person who gets the "end" first.  She gets to read the book Evelyn has placed on a white wicker basket.  Score!

Ta da!

Cheers!

2011 was a wonderful year for our family.  We didn't have any babies this year and we didn't move.  It was relatively calm; we really settled in as a family of four.  We had great visits from family members and we flew to the East Coast twice to see family as well.  The beginning of 2011 was rough for me personally-- and by extension, it probably wasn't always easy for my supportive husband.  I was at times swept under water by post-partum depression and anxiety.  I reflected on my experience just a few days ago as I did a few simple household tasks before heading out the door with kids.  We were all awake, dressed, fed, and I had the energy to empty the dishwasher and fold some laundry and still leave the house.  If this sounds like a piece of cake to you, thank your lucky stars.  I did.
 
I stopped and smiled to myself and thought-- I must really be better.  The healing process for me was such a gradual one that it seemed I'd always feel exhausted and drained.  I was terrified that I would forever feel uncomfortable in my own skin, like a lioness pacing in a small cage.  As a competetive, educated woman, it is still difficult for me to admit that I needed help here and there.  I strive for perfection and yet, I can vividly recall tears streaming down my face as our post-partum doula helped calm one crying child while I had the other (sleeping) child.  I needed another woman to help me mother my children for a couple of hours and I felt that I had failed in all of the ways that matter. 

The truth is, though, I was giving my children my best.  Finding ways to support myself and making Lindsey, not just Mama, a priority helped me push through the thick of PPD and anxiety.  It is still important to take time away, whether it's book club once a month-- which has been just fabulous-- or an hour in the evening out by myself.  It's true that I haven't slept for more than three or four hours at time in over three and a half years, but I feel much more in tune with myself.  This year, we're making it a priority for my husband to get away now and then too (and more time for the two of us as well)!  Happy New Year to you!